I have so many thoughts going thru my head.  I cry myself to sleep almost every night.  Sleep doesn't come easily to me, but I don't like how I feel when I medicate myself, so I only do that when I have reached my maximum of sleepless nights. 

I am tired often because of the sleepless nights.  It is difficult to be a "chipper" mom when you are tired.  My kids are tired too.  I think they feel the stress and tension in our home and so needless to say, last night, my 2 youngest hit a brick wall at about 7:30.  I got so much done while they slept.  I have to admit, it was really nice. 

Yesterday, I struggled to stay asleep.  I was up 4 times between 1:00 and 4:48 as I had so many thoughts going thru my head.  I didn't go for my walk at 5:30 because I finally fell back to sleep.  Needless to say, I overslept and my 12 year old daughter did too.  When we finally woke, she had 15 minutes to get ready for school and get out the door (according to her time clock!).  We wouldn't have let her be late, she could have had a ride, but the social calendar with the friends was far more important.  She was so angry with me.  She yelled at me the entire time she was getting ready.  I have learned that it is not worth the fight with her, so I just sat there.  I took it.  As she was leaving our home she yells "goodbye, I love you!". 

Again, I question, what is love?  Do we just say that, is it just words, or is it really emotion?