I went to the NAMI support group last night.  We usually just talk about our week.  We had a new individual in group that started talking about flashbacks.  Needless to say, it totally triggered me.  I was not ready for that, and not being able to see my therapist for 2 weeks, I was in a vulnerable state as it was, it did not make for a good mix. 

As I was walking out of group, I picked up a pamphlet on Borderline Personality.  It mentions in there that it is very hard for one with borderline to find a therapist, let alone keep a therapist.  I have been thru a lot of therapists, I feel, and this was also not a good mix.  After being dropped by a therapist, one leaving town, and then dropping a therapist for unethical reasons.  I am a perfect poster child for one that has gone thru their fair share of therapists. 

I can't do this anymore, I need a break from this mental illness crap.  Tomorrow is the 4th of July, a day where everyone gets a break from real life and gets to celebrate our freedom.  Unfortunately, mental illness never takes a vacation.  There are ways (medication, and therapy) to make the mental illness more controlled.  But, it doesn't go away. 

Today I found out at work that I never commit to anything (according to my boss).   Yesterday, my husband was reading a news article about bullying in the workplace.  I evidently fit the description of one that is being bullied by my boss.