I have read so much about mental illness.  What does it mean when you have a mental illness?  I read an article on how mental illness is just like cancer, or a heart condition, but most often, cancer goes away.  Dr's can fix a heart condition.  Mental Illness doesn't go away.  I will have BiPolar for the rest of my life.  One comment Jade said to me last weekend that has stuck with me is he stated that he got the impression that I felt like my mental illness was a choice.  Maybe I do, maybe I am hoping that all of this will go away, maybe I'm dreaming, maybe I'm not.  Why can't it be a choice?