I don't know how to feel.  I am still very numb-I think that is a good thing, but maybe not.  As I sit and ponder on my Bipolar diagnosis I am confused and my head hurts. 

I went to BRIDGES which is a class that Nami puts on.  It was very interesting.  I had a lot of anxiety while I was there.  A young girl clicked her pen the entire night.  I struggle with the pen clicking as it is a trigger for me.  I am getting better with it, but it still made me anxious Tuesday night. 

I started on Lamotrigine, I don't feel any difference yet.  They say I should be tracking my mood.  Unfortunately, I think that I am still in the depressed state.  There is so much going on in my life.  I am still struggling financially.  I work 2 jobs and still can't get ahead.  I don't know what more I am supposed to do. 

I processed my flashback with Jade last week.  I have felt so much better.  They say that the flashbacks lose their intensity when you tell someone.  So, I did just that, I still need to talk to my Bishop about my feelings of worthiness.  This needs to be done before the Ogden Temple Dedication next week.

I still have a lot of anxiety.