I'm not going to lie, today has been a rough day.  I know, it's another day of me saying it is a rough day!  As I had my suicidal thoughts on Monday, I had picked today to be my last day.  To be honest, it hurts me to even say that, but I just couldn't keep going like I was.  Thankfully, I had Jed give me a priesthood blessing and it seemed to calm me, add on the Bishop's kind words and I am living another day. 

Mark, my boss, came back home from his little vacation.  He started on me the entire morning.  He advised me how frustrated he was with me.  At one point I finally turned to him and told him that I couldn't keep frustrating any more that I wasn't mentally well enough to do the job that he was asking me to do.  Of course, he wouldn't let me quit, which I find is ironic, especially if I am frustrating him as much as he says. 

I did finally hear from Jade, it was a blessing that I really needed.  I needed it to just continue down this road that I am on.  I needed to know that he was still OK with me, even after all my craziness this week (yes, I was really crazy this week!).